It seemed Nam Kangwoo's anxiety was for nothing, as I felt good all day. The professor, who usually filled every single minute of class as if there were no exceptions, ended the lecture a whole 20 minutes early due to unavoidable personal reasons, and Park Chanmin, sitting next to me, was quiet for some reason.
For some reason, the day was going exceptionally smoothly. I felt like humming, but not knowing many songs, I couldn't contain my excitement and hummed a children's song that popped into my head. As I hummed while shoving my belongings into my bag, Park Chanmin let out a small laugh.
'What the. Why is he laughing….'
“Hyung.”
“Yeah?”
“Ah— really.”
Park Chanmin's voice was full of laughter. When I stopped packing my bag and looked up at Park Chanmin, his eyes were curved like half-moons.
“Why?”
“Because you're especially cute today.”
“...?”
'What the….' I almost swore at Park Chanmin's out-of-the-blue, compliment-like words, but I managed to hold it in and just glared at him. I couldn't let something like this ruin my good mood.
“Hyung, should we get lunch at the cafeteria?”
As I slung my bag over my shoulder and turned around, Park Chanmin, who had naturally followed me, asked. I wasn't really feeling it, but with no other options, I gave a half-hearted nod.
As we left the lecture hall, the quiet Park Chanmin from this morning disappeared, and the usual chatterbox walked shoulder-to-shoulder with me. This bastard— no, Park Chanmin— chattered endlessly as if trying to tell me all the news in the world, bringing up a new topic as soon as one ended.
It was noisy, but he just didn't seem to know when to stop. Listening to the meaningless words that went in one ear and out the other, I just nodded or replied with, “Really?”
It was incredibly annoying, but Park Chanmin either didn't notice at all or simply didn't know how to shut his mouth.
While walking like that, listening to words I wouldn't even remember, my arm was suddenly grabbed as if it were snatched. I really... stumbled, almost ridiculously so. If Park Chanmin hadn't reflexively grabbed my other arm, I might have fallen in a comical way. A sense of shame, which had faded for a while, spread through my body that fluttered like a piece of paper.
“Ugh—”
“Oppa!”
A rather familiar title and voice rang in my ear. A voice tinged with laughter scanned my face and quickly added, “Were you surprised?”
“Huh? Ah... oh, Nari. It's you, Nari.”
“I was just so happy to see you, I wanted to surprise you... I…. I'm sorry, oppa.”
Seeing my bewildered face and how much I'd stumbled, Jin Nari quickly spat out an apology. Right, it's not something to be sorry for… but I was surprised…. Giving a rough nod, I looked down, alternating my gaze between my arms, which were being held by Jin Nari and Park Chanmin.
“It's fine. Can I just….”
As I smiled awkwardly and twisted my hand, Jin Nari and Park Chanmin both went “Ah,” and let go at the same time. I rubbed my tightly gripped wrist and laughed out of embarrassment. 'Ah, damn it… so embarrassing….'
“By the way, oppa, where are you going?”
Jin Nari asked, carefully studying my face.
“We're going to get lunch. We're getting cafeteria food, want to come with?”
I asked out of courtesy, of course. It was fine if she came, and it was fine if she refused. But Jin Nari's eyes sparkled as if she had been waiting for my question.
“Is that really okay?”
Then, she opened her already large eyes wide and glanced at Park Chanmin. Park Chanmin, who was standing beside me with a sullen face, muttered, “Do whatever,” and only then did she nod and say, “I'll go,” linking her arm with mine.
Ah, this… didn't feel right, but Jin Nari showed no intention of removing her arm from mine. It was getting a bit… awkward, but I missed the timing to pull away because Jin Nari's phone started ringing.
Holding my arm tightly, she laughed continuously as she talked on the phone, as if something was very amusing, and ended the call with the cryptic words, “Come over here.”
“Oppa, my friend said she hasn't had lunch yet either, so I told her to come. That's okay, right?”
“Hey, you should ask before you tell them to come.”
Park Chanmin, who had been walking quietly beside me, snapped, his sullen expression unchanged.
“Uh… do-don't fight. I'm fine with it. Really… Chanmin.”
“Hyung, you're super shy around strangers. Didn't you know?”
I flinched and trembled at his irritated voice. The atmosphere seemed to have turned sharp, so I soothed Park Chanmin, saying, “It's okay, really.” 'What's with him…' The suddenly prickly Park Chanmin felt a little unfamiliar. 'Is this something to get that angry about…'
“Oppa, are you uncomfortable? I didn't realize….”
As I mouthed “What's wrong?” at Park Chanmin, Jin Nari pulled my arm towards her chest, her words trailing off.
“Uh… no, it's okay. Really.”
'Ah, caught between these two, what am I even doing….' Forget lunch, I just want to hole up somewhere and sleep.
“Well….”
I was in the middle of choosing a suitable reply. In that short moment, the downturned corners of her eyes quickly cast a sullen look on Jin Nari's face.
I nudged Park Chanmin with my elbow, replied “It's okay” again, and started walking. Whether it's two, three, or four of us eating. We always eat as a group of four anyway, so I figured what could change just because the people were different. Like an idiot.
It was a moment I dismissed as no big deal. I'd underestimated my housemates' jealousy. I thought too lightly, 'What could possibly happen from having lunch together once?' If only I could have foreseen the future, I would have desperately tried to stop Jin Nari. Truly, I would have. Or I would have just ignored Park Chanmin's prickliness.
***
We took a table by the window, and with our different dishes in front of us, we focused on eating, exchanging occasional conversation. Jin Nari's friend had joined us too, and her... name was….
“Seoyun, this is your first time seeing Yeoul oppa, right?”
Right, Han Seoyun. Hearing Han Seoyun's name at the perfect moment, I nodded unconsciously. She nodded slightly, her cheeks flushed. With an overall tall and slender image, she glanced at me for a moment, but as soon as our eyes met, she quickly lowered her head.
“Yeah, I've seen him from afar a few times, but this is the first time in person….”
A shy voice hovered quietly over the table. Feeling awkward myself, I could only laugh uncomfortably. Like some kind of fool.
I didn't even know if the food was going into my mouth or my nose. I wasn't very hungry, but I ate more than usual, worried it would be awkward if I didn't eat much. My stomach felt bloated. As I forced a bite of salad from the side of my plate into my mouth, Park Chanmin's hand grabbed the one holding my fork.
“Stop eating, hyung. You can't usually eat this much.”
“What's with you, Park Chanmin? Hanging out with Yeoul oppa all the time, did you become like the sunbaes? You're so cheesy.”
Jin Nari watched Park Chanmin's actions as if they were amusing and laughed without any malice. Despite that, Park Chanmin seemed a bit displeased. The atmosphere was a bit… uncomfortable. 'Why are these guys acting like this.'
My eyes, having lost their focus, were staring into space when I unintentionally made eye contact with Han Seoyun as she raised her head. She flinched noticeably.
“Sorry, this is uncomfortable, isn't it.”
“Ah, no, it's not. Really, I'm not uncomfortable at all. Really.”
I discreetly cleared my utensils, looking for a chance to get up and leave first. 'But then why… why is everyone else clearing their utensils….' I was always tired, but I was especially exhausted today. My whole body sagged as if heavy weights were tied to it.
I stared blankly at Park Chanmin, who had stacked my utensils on top of his own plate, and muttered, “Thanks.” Damn it... I had no energy even after eating. It seemed like the “power of a good meal” didn't apply to me.
Leaving the restaurant, the four of us naturally made our way to a café. I felt half out of it, and as if sensing my state, Park Chanmin shifted my bag onto his own shoulder and looked me over.
“Hyung, are you okay?”
“Huh...? Uh… I think so….”
My steps slowed down. The weather was very nice, but instead of going to the café, I wanted to sit on a bench in front of me and just bask in the sun.
By the time I came to my senses, a steaming cup of Americano was placed in front of me. Park Chanmin, seeming to have lightened up a bit, was laughing and chatting with the other three. 'Does Park Chanmin know Han Seoyun, too….'
Han Seoyun was smiling, her face much more relaxed than at the restaurant. I found myself staring as she laughed and said, “That's right,” while talking with Park Chanmin. Her long eyes curved like half-moons whenever she smiled. The dimples under her eyes seemed to instantly soften her cold impression.
As if she felt my gaze, Han Seoyun's eyes turned towards me. The moment our eyes met, a blush spread across her tan skin. She raised her hand and rubbed her cheeks and other parts of her face.
“Um….”
“Huh?”
“Is there something on my face?”
Han Seoyun, covering even her mouth with her hand, asked in a voice still full of shyness. I wasn't staring like that, I regretted, and shook my head vigorously in embarrassment. “No, sorry,” I quickly answered and lowered my gaze.
Jin Nari looked back and forth between Han Seoyun and me, then suddenly burst out laughing.
“You two are so cute. It's making me all tingly.”
“Huh?”
When both Han Seoyun and I asked back with bewildered faces, Jin Nari shrugged and added.
“Just because. Seoyun is being so shy, and oppa keeps looking only at Seoyun.”
Her laughter-filled voice drilled into my ears. I wondered if I really had, but seeing Han Seoyun's cheeks, which were redder than before, made my own face heat up. Jin Nari's eyes twinkled as she urged, “Let's go drinking, let's get drinks!”
“Let's skip class and go drinking! The weather's so nice, who goes to class on a day like this! It's a day for drinks, drinks!”
Jin Nari's voice was excited. Park Chanmin, as if excited by the mention of drinking, also said, “Let's go, let's go.” 'The guy who was so prickly just a moment ago… has no backbone….'
I shook my head slightly, then my body trembled as the three of them flashed through my mind. I thought, 'I should contact them,' but then dismissed it as no big deal, thinking, 'I can just do it later,' and nodded.
It'll be fine. It's normal for a college student to skip class and go drinking.
Thinking, 'I just have to contact them before I go home,' I rationalized the day drinking and got up, following the others. As my vision warped like always, I staggered and was caught by Park Chanmin's hand, who steadied me.
“Hyung, you're really….”
“Yeah?”
“Sometimes I think I understand why the sunbaes treat you like a glass bead in their hands.”
…What's that supposed to mean? I tilted my head, not understanding his words.
“It's just, watching you is really….”
“Like you might break.” Park Chanmin muttered in a voice only I could hear as he moved away from the table.
Unable to comprehend his words, I let out a “Huh,” mouth agape, before following the three walking ahead. This bastard, that bastard, they all seem to notice my weakness too well, and it irritated me a little.
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