***
Today's breakfast was toast spread with blueberry jam.
Normally, I would have planned to skip breakfast because I was so preoccupied with yesterday's kiss. If my courage resembled Han Sol's, it would be one thing, but the me on the inside was naive. I was timid and had no guts. It was only natural for me to be flustered by the kiss with Han Jinheon, and I didn't have the confidence to face him.
I thought I would be like this all day today. However, Han Jinheon wouldn't leave me alone. Not by saying I shouldn't skip a meal, but by telling me I had to take my medicine. Hearing those words strangely drained my energy. I also felt pathetic for being the only one fussing over a kiss.
Han Jinheon, who had easily finished two slices of toast, picked up his coffee cup. He studied my face as I ate with a dejected expression, even though I had done nothing wrong, and spoke.
"You look well. Did you sleep well?"
"Hyung, isn't it strange? I thought I wouldn't be able to sleep, but I closed my eyes and when I opened them, it was morning."
I parted ways with Han Jinheon around ten o'clock yesterday. Since we're in the same house, it's a bit much to say we "parted ways," but the time I was freed from him was roughly around ten.
Even as I rolled around in my room, the thought of the kiss wouldn't disappear, and I thought I was doomed. I was so tired I had to sleep, but I anticipated the worst-case scenario of not being able to sleep soundly due to my persistently disruptive heart.
But thankfully, I fell asleep as soon as I closed my eyes. A feeling of exhaustion grabbed me by the ankles and dragged me into sleep. The funny thing is, I only laze around and freeload at home.
Han Jinheon crossed his long legs and drank his coffee. Then, he placed his tattooed fingers on his knee and idly toyed with them as if playing a keyboard. From what I could see, it was a habit he wasn't conscious of.
"It must be because of my pheromones."
"Because of the pheromones? You get that sleepy just from receiving them?"
"You do. Even if your mind isn't conscious of it, your body must have been fatigued from receiving the pheromones."
"......"
"Don't you get it? To explain it easily at your level, when you wake up in the morning, that place reacts, right? Even though you're not aroused,"
"Ah! I get it! I said I get it!"
'There's no need to give such an example, I'm telling you. Must you talk about erections while a person is eating, huh?'
When I questioned him like someone who had suffered a great injustice, Han Jinheon's one corner of his mouth lifted noticeably as he grinned. He had joked with me before, being polite while still being cheeky, and it was the same now. If you look closely, he liked these kinds of jokes.
"Ah, I almost forgot. I have a copy of the agreement in my bag."
"You have it in your bag?"
"Yes. I'll give it to you, so get ready to delete every single contact on your phone."
"Hyung, you know that saying, connections are all money... We don't know when or how they might be helpful, so wouldn't it be too much of a waste to delete them all at once?"
"Your connections could never become money. Because they're all just a bunch of guys who flocked to you for the body you so generously gave away."
Generously gave away. How can one generously give away their body? The question was resolved before it could even form a question mark. It just means he played around without being picky.
"Since you're living a new life, why don't you build new connections too? Though I wonder if that's even possible."
"...Alright, let's do this. You told me before to delete everyone except family. Please leave Secretary Song and Secretary Jeong. Doctor Kim and Lawyer Park too..."
Han Jinheon's eyebrows shot up. To him, the position of the people I mentioned was ambiguous. Deleting them because they weren't family felt cold-hearted, but keeping them felt unsettling as it didn't align with the agreement's conditions.
I, of course, wanted to keep at least these people. Although they were people who already knew Han Sol, they were also connections I had made after my possession, so they were special.
"Do that for now. Leave just those four and delete the rest."
He said no to other people. He firmly insisted that he would only allow those four for now, so I nodded resolutely and munched on the remaining toast.
Then, a sharp thought suddenly occupied my mind, and my eyes widened on their own. My nostrils flared and narrowed by themselves. I'm not trying to pick at his words, but.
"Hyung, you said to delete everyone. You only said to delete them, and that's it, right? If I were to newly make friends with someone, that's an exception, right?"
"What?"
"You also told me to build new connections. So those connections are unrelated to the contract? We're making this clear, right?"
"It's troublesome if you only hear what you want to hear. Did you hear the part where I said I wonder if it's even possible?"
"......"
"Your effort to find a loophole in the contract is commendable, but you do remember the other conditions, right? You have to delete your social media too."
"Hyung, I've thought about it, and couldn't it become money? I have a lot of followers, so later... for advertisements and such..."
"What company would give you an advertisement unless they wanted to go bankrupt? Don't have such useless thoughts."
I felt disappointed when he said that. My lips pouted.
Despite how it looks, I thought about it really hard. In the case of social media, since it's a domain I'm unfamiliar with, I searched a lot and read thoroughly to find its uses. Someone at Han Sol's level was a celebrity, so he could make a living off advertisements. It was more than enough. Unlike what Han Jinheon said, it was obvious there would be companies seeking me out despite my image.
I want to go back to before we wrote the contract. I agreed to Han Jinheon's conditions too easily. I said yes to everything at the thought of getting a building. Well, there's also the fact that I really like this man.
"For now, don't think about anything and just focus on your manifestation. That's all you need to do."
"Yes, yes..."
"Don't forget to take your medicine."
Han Jinheon concluded the conversation with a light reminder, then straightened his legs and stood up. After clearing his spot, he ruffled my hair as he passed by me.
***
After I finished breakfast, I received the copy of the agreement from Han Jinheon. Like a child who received chocolate for doing a good deed, I held the paper in both hands and cheered as I entered my room.
As soon as I came in, I lay down on the bed and examined the contract. Other than the fact that it was notarized, nothing had changed from before, but just like then, there was something that stood out. Even now, the conditions written in the contract were skewed only in my favor. I should have demanded more.
I wondered where to put the contract, then placed it at the bottom of the suitcase that had accompanied me to this mansion. It was the only space that only I knew about in this place where there was nowhere special to keep valuables.
I want to quickly withdraw the cash I received from Lee Geumyoung and put it here too...
"Ugh. This is comfortable..."
Choosing to stay inside rather than go out of the room, I wriggled onto the bed and lay down. I closed my eyes for a moment, leaning into the cozy feeling, then tossed and turned out of boredom.
It's boring being alone. I wanted to go over to Han Jinheon's side and bother him if I could, but I decided to concede for now. Doesn't he need personal time too? I also needed time to ruminate on the kiss.
My first kiss, which Han Jinheon had so meaninglessly snatched away. I was chuckling to myself over that first kiss, not knowing whether to laugh or cry, when I fell asleep.
I opened my eyes to the pleasantly warm winter morning sunlight shining through the window. Should I get a glass of water? I was trudging downstairs when I changed direction and headed for the study where Han Jinheon would be.
I knocked and then opened the door. Han Jinheon's study was the place in this mansion that received the least sunlight. It didn't matter whether the blinds were down or not. A constant environment unaffected by sunlight was maintained.
And compared to the other rooms, it was the place with the best scent lingering in it. The reason was a diffuser placed to help concentrate on work, and it suited my nose perfectly. It wasn't irritating or strong, so the more I smelled it, the better it was.
I approached Han Jinheon, thinking I'd like my pheromones to be like this. He was sitting on a recliner sofa installed in a corner of the study, leisurely reading a book. Seeing him like that, he looks just like a businessman out of a magazine.
"Come closer."
I had intended to watch Han Jinheon and then leave quietly. I, who was about to sit in any random empty seat, stopped awkwardly and tilted my head. The person who hadn't even given me a glance when I came in was now suddenly telling me to come closer.
As I approached closer as he wished, Han Jinheon patted his lap.
"Don't bother sitting somewhere far away, just sit on hyung's lap. Since you're here anyway, you can receive pheromones too, it's a win-win."
"...Huh? S-sit where?"
"My lap."
"...You want me to sit on your lap?!"
I was just planning to watch and then leave. Because the sight of him reading was like a sculpture. I was just going to glaze over that sculpture with my eyes and leave, but what is this heart-stopping thing to say?
What? Sit on his lap?
"It's obvious you came here after dozing off. It's a good way to wake up and receive pheromones too."
"Even so... how can I sit on your lap..."
Can I sit? I do want to sit there, though.
As I hesitated while hiding my true feelings, a reasonable suspicion suddenly arises. I think this Alpha is the one flirting, not me. If 'B' were Han Jinheon right now, this would be a violation.
"The guy who even acted all cute doesn't want to sit on my lap, I see."
"That's because..."
The purpose is different and I have no experience. Acting cute (aegyo), though embarrassing, was one of my frequently used special moves to get what I wanted. It was hard at first, but as I used it repeatedly, I got used to it. In comparison, I've never once sat on someone's lap. I've never even thought of it, so I feel like it would be nothing but mortifying, what should I do?
What should I do? I'm a man with strong Confucian values. If an adult ten years older than me tells me to do something, I should do it. Yup, what an excuse...
***