What I asked for was a simple evening walk in the park near the house. By the time we finished clearing the table, it had already passed eight—so it became more of a night walk than an evening stroll.
Han Jinheon said he had been expecting me to ask for a shopping spree. He seemed quite surprised by my request for a walk, but when I told him I felt a bit suffocated and just wanted to get out, he agreed immediately.
Even though the weather was chilly, he said he’d happily go, as tonight was the least cold day compared to yesterday, tomorrow, and the days to come.
He could have just said he’d go, but why did he have to make it such a long explanation?
The unexpected problem was that we couldn't take the car since he'd had wine. In any case, the park was close enough that we didn't need a car. It was just a short walk.
“Put these on first.”
Han Jinheon held out a set of winter gear to me.
Even if tonight was the “least cold,” he had non-negotiable conditions for our walk. Just like when we went to the hospital, the long padded jacket was mandatory, as were the hood, a muffler, and a mask. And I had to put heat packs in every pocket.
Did I really need to be this bundled up? Han Jinheon’s conditions were absurd, but I had nothing to say. I knew from his constant reminders that this lean body of mine had a low temperature and was prone to catching colds.
"You’re about to become an Omega, so you need to be treated with care now.”
How wonderful would it be if I were becoming Han Jinheon’s Omega? How thrilling would it be if he was cherishing me to make me his own? I think I might even cry.
I was grateful that he had wrapped me up so tightly against the cold. But I couldn’t help but grumble that I couldn't tell if I was out to enjoy a leisurely night or to exercise in full winter gear.
Despite my whining, Han Jinheon was unfazed and even gave me his gloves, saying he’d seen the backs of my hands turn red from just the short exposure to the wind on the way here.
I hated how much heavier my body felt, but in the end, it was all to take care of me, and my heart melted. This was driving me crazy. I liked it but I hated it; I hated it but I liked it. No, I just liked it. I liked it because it was Han Jinheon.
I stared at the alluring tattoo revealed when he took off his gloves. Together forever. I savored the meaning inwardly and shifted my gaze to the gloves now concealing my own hands.
The inside of Han Jinheon’s glove was warm even without a hot pack, instantly melting my icy cold hands.
"You should be the one wearing all this, Hyung. Don’t you think I look ridiculous?”
I spread my arms and spun around, implicitly asking him to look at me, bundled up enough to beat back the cold.
When I mumbled that others would think I was being unnecessarily dramatic, like someone who had come from Alaska, Han Jinheon tried to appease me with a lenient attitude.
"It can’t be helped. This is better than you catching a cold and ending up coughing and sniffling.”
“Didn’t you hear my health screening results earlier? I’m perfectly healthy, they said.”
“Healthy people still get colds.”
“That’s true, but… I came out because I felt suffocated, and now I feel even more suffocated.”
Han Jinheon chuckled, admitting he hadn’t thought of that. He must have found the sight he’d created of me quite amusing. I wondered if this was some kind of punishment. If he was punishing me.
"And yet you’re only wearing a jacket…”
Han Jinheon, standing at the end of my gaze, glanced down at himself and gave a nonchalant shrug.
He was wearing only a black bomber jacket that looked expensive at a glance, its luxurious feel balanced with a casual air from its wool collar.
I didn’t like that his fashion was so simple compared to my fully-armored state, but it suited him so well, like a model, that I couldn’t help but give him a thumbs-up.
“I thought you only looked good in formal stuff like suits, Hyung. You look good in clothes like this, too.”
"Of course I do. The clothes hanger is good.”
“Wow. To say something like that with your own mouth…”
It was obviously a joke, but I couldn't argue. His very presence was proof of his words. Still, I stubbornly booed him, “Boooo!”
“There’s no one in the park, who are you trying to show off to?”
“Show off to who?. Han Sol, you look quite warm. If someone suddenly appeared and stared, they wouldn’t even know it was you.”
I knew he was trying to hide my face in case someone recognized me. The only time I hadn't covered my face was the day Lee Geumyeong had forcibly dragged me away. I almost always went out with my face concealed.
I understood the sentiment, but on a day like today, wasn't it true that there was no one around to recognize me anyway?
The park, where I walked alone with this Alpha, was quiet and desolate. There wasn't so much as an ant to be seen, let alone another person. It would have been stranger to see anything on a night when the cold was raging.
If anything was shamelessly breaking the park's silence, it was the two of us. To be precise, my voice held the larger share.
When I looked into Han Jinheon’s eyes, I would often fall into their depths and my words would cease, but when I walked shoulder-to-shoulder with him, I couldn't stop talking.
The fact that the person I liked was listening intently to my words made me feel giddy.
“Hyung... What do you think about the Chairman… father? Has anything changed with how he sees me?”
A month and several days had passed since Chairman Han sent people. While not enough time to resolve his animosity towards Han Sol, wasn't he curious about his son?
Although Han Jinheon had once coldly stated that a day of forgiveness would never come, I was still spinning a positive scenario, emphasizing the family connection.
“You could say he’s the same. And he could remain the same in the future.”
“In the future, too…? He’ll keep hating me?”
The words alone painted a bleak picture, making me want to believe what I wanted to believe. Han Jinheon is probably just saying that because he doesn’t see any possibility of forgiveness for now.
But Han Sol is his son too, surely he’ll forgive him someday. Maybe he’ll soften up if I become an Omega. The contradiction was that I myself knew it wasn't true.
“Maybe I should do as my mother said, become an Omega and meet someone who can be helpful to my father or the company.”
I was only human; I didn't want to be hated any more than I already was. And to live comfortably as Han Sol, I needed Han Dongshik's forgiveness.
Even if I were to become an Omega and live a new life, I would eventually meet someone, fall in love, and get married. If that person couldn't be Han Jinheon, then I figured it might as well be some guy who could be useful to the company. If I did that, wouldn't Lee Geumyeong come to love me, too?
Of course, I couldn't declare it so rashly. It was just a thought born from the heartache of liking Han Jinheon now and imagining a future where I had to give him up, leading me to consider a business marriage.
“Forget the company. You should be with someone who’s good for you.”
“Good for me?”
"I’m saying that even if you become an Omega, you should meet someone who will love you for you. If a guy appears who focuses on who you are, rather than your background, then you should settle down.”
A wave of emotion washed over me at his words, which were so full of brotherly concern, but the reality that this man could never be that person immediately made my heart ache.
If I hadn't been wearing a mask, how would those complicated emotions have shown on my face? I purposefully scrunched up my nose and said to him,
“You must have been impressed by what I said back then, huh?”
"That, and I’m also telling you not to make father's forgiveness the reason for your manifestation. You’re not trying to become an Omega because of him, are you?”
“No, but…”
“I can respect that foolish desire to be forgiven by father, but that's as far as it goes. Don't keep a man who has ignored you your whole life in your life and cling to him. You need to clear your mind to match the new life you're about to have.”
"Right… You’re absolutely right, Hyung. But I’m not trying to argue, I’m just genuinely wondering what if my life changes for the worse than it is now?”
“Well. At least this face won’t let that happen.”
Was telling me my face wouldn’t let that happen a compliment? Was he saying it's because I'm pretty?
Han Jinheon reached out and adjusted my mask, then straightened the muffler around my neck. The brief action quieted the atmosphere, making the air feel heavy. His low voice, soft as it slipped through the silence, added to the weight.
“Even if things do change for the worse, don’t worry. I told you I’d take responsibility for you to the end.”
“……”
"Ah, and just in case you’re wondering, I have no intention of turning our family into a complete trainwreck with a messed-up family tree.”
Han Jinheon chuckled with a playful face. This was undoubtedly a teasing jab at Han Sol, who had jokingly threatened to ruin the family by bearing his brother’s child.
At the time, I was incredibly startled by those words, but now I calmly pulled my mask up to just below my eyes, covering my face. It was a good thing I had the mask on. I didn’t have to show Han Jinheon my face reddening in real-time.
I wanted to be like Han Sol and threaten him, even as a bluff, that I would have his child. But I knew my genuine feelings for him were so hopelessly entangled in the sentiment that it would just sound pathetic.
It wouldn't even sound like a threat, so I couldn't voice the words, only roll them around inside my mouth.
“I get it. You’re trying to comfort me, right? This is just your way of comforting me, isn’t it? Anyone else who heard our conversation would seriously misunderstand.”
Han Jinheon tilted his head. He looked like he didn't understand what "misunderstanding" I was talking about.
"Honestly, even if I do become an Omega… it’s strange for an older brother to take responsibility for his younger brother.”
“Strange?”
“Yes. You’ll meet someone you need to be responsible for someday, too. So it’s strange for hyung to be responsible for your brother as well. It’s a burden for you and for the person you’ll be with.”
His promise to take responsibility was reassuring, but I knew I shouldn't lean on it. I’m capable of that much discernment.
I was about to end the conversation by telling him not to worry, but Han Jinheon stopped walking and called my name. “Han Sol.”
“Then I’ll have to be perfectly clear so there are no misunderstandings between us.”
“Huh? About what? I haven’t misunderstood anything.”
“My promise to take responsibility for you is sincere, and I’ve never thought it strange.”
“…..”
"You may be the kid father brought home, but now, you’re like an appendage attached to me. A pitiful creature I have to save.”
“…Ah.”
When I heard him say he meant it about taking responsibility, for a moment, everything centered around my heart came to a stop.
The air around me seemed to slow, so much so that I could feel every passing second on my skin. But then, calling me an appendage, a pitiful creature—it completely deflated my mood. My stopped heart plummeted straight to the ground.
For a second, it had been as thrilling as hearing a confession. My heart had pounded, but now, not only was I annoyed, but my nose stung as tears welled up.
I hate it. I hate it. Being this Alpha’s brother was already heartbreaking enough, but to have the perception of being a pitiful creature added on top of it…
Why did Han Jinheon see me as pitiful?
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