Whenever I recalled what Mo Taehee had done to me, I would lie still and then shake violently as if having a seizure. Why did he suddenly do that to me... I mean, damn it... it was my first time.
I swear, I never imagined my first kiss would be with a guy.
I rubbed my lips, which were swollen to two or three times their normal size, again and again. What am I going to do about this? What am I going to do about Mo Taehee?
I pondered. Should I let it go just this once? No, I need to be firm, especially at times like this. My mind kept wavering.
I lay straight, then turned to my side, then abruptly sat up, repeating this until the black night turned into a blue dawn.
After spending the night awake, I cautiously turned the doorknob, which I hadn't unlocked all night, and opened the door. If I stayed here, I might not just die prematurely but of a heart attack. Anywhere would be better than here.
My heart shriveled, and I couldn't bring myself to step outside, so I looked around. I wondered if anyone was there. I was also a little scared because Seo Jaehoon had pounded on the door like he was going to break it down last night.
Only after looking around for a long time and confirming that no one was there did I slip out of the room. I pulled my hood and mask down low over my head, wearing a padded jacket that reached below my knees, and walked across the living room without making a sound. Even though all three of them were obviously in dreamland in their respective rooms, I still looked around cautiously.
I passed through the living room, down the long hallway, and had the goal in sight.
I really walked like a stealthy cat. Without making a sound. Even lifting my heels pitifully.
The front door was only three or four steps away. I covered my mouth with my mask to hide my increasingly rough breathing. My heart felt like it was about to jump out of my chest.
Now, opening the middle door would lead to the front entrance. I thought I was done. It was the moment I reached out and grabbed the cold sliding door handle.
Pop—all the lights in the house turned on brightly. Goddammit, my life...
I realized for the first time today that people can't move when they're too surprised.
"Ha Yeoul, where are you going?"
I heard a voice behind me, so low it sent shivers down my spine.
"Ha Yeoul."
I heard my name called again. Frozen in place, I slowly turned around, taking my hand off the handle. My gaze slowly moved upward from the tips of his white toes on the floor.
I faced Seo Jaehoon, who had gray sweatpants, a black t-shirt, and a bird's nest on his head, looking as scary as could be.
His eyes, as he crossed his arms and tilted his head slightly to look at me, were ominous. Yeah, my appearance... my appearance is a mess...
I hesitantly approached Seo Jaehoon.
"Well..."
"Where are you going?"
"Huh? Oh... I'm not going anywhere... well... a walk, I'm going for a walk."
Seo Jaehoon scoffed at the absurd words that came out of my mouth.
"At this hour?"
Not forgetting to check the clock on the wall.
The clock read exactly 5:37 AM. The sun would be up soon, so wouldn't it be okay to go at this hour? I moved my lips, trying to bring out the excuse I had prepared in my head.
"Well, the sun will be up soon..."
Our voices were a little loud, and I heard movement from the room beyond the door. I'm screwed...
One by one, the doors opened behind me with a click, click sound. How could these guys be such light sleepers? They woke up earlier than my grandfather. Or maybe they just didn't sleep in as late as my grandmother.
I couldn't hide my dismayed face and dropped my head sharply. What excuses could I make now? I wondered. What should I say to make these light sleepers understand me?
"Yeoul-ah."
"Ha Yeoul."
Mo Taehee and Nam Kangwoo called my name a beat late. Yeah, I was dressed like a thief and standing in front of the front door, so it was understandable that these guys would look at me ominously.
No. But whether I leave the house or not, what does it have to do with these guys that they're coming out here from dawn?
"Where are you going?"
Nam Kangwoo asked in a low, subdued voice. I couldn't even think of turning away from Seo Jaehoon, and I mumbled, "Well... just..."
"He said he's going for a walk."
"What?"
Seo Jaehoon blurted out the words I had said without hesitation.
"Ha Yeoul, she's going for a walk at 5:30 in the morning."
He said it again exactly, as if to confirm. It wasn't 30 minutes, it was 37 minutes.
I tried to open my mouth as if to make excuses, regretting the 7 minutes that had been reduced, but then closed it again.
"No... I... well..."
Seo Jaehoon stood blankly for a moment, then strode towards me and grabbed my arm. I groaned, making a ugh sound at the roughly grabbed wrist. His grip was amazing.
I gave up trying to shake off his arm early on and walked, led by Seo Jaehoon's hand. I sighed softly when I was dragged to the sofa and sat down as if thrown onto the best seat.
The gathered riffraff... no, my housemates, sat side by side and looked at me as if they were going to do something to me with their eyes. It felt like they weren't just trying to intimidate me with their gazes, but to actually kill me.
I raised my head and scanned the housemates 1, 2, and 3 with their bird's nests, then focused my gaze on the table. I chased each of the gold-embroidered engravings one by one, thinking about what excuses to make. Even though I hadn't done anything wrong.
"Where are you trying to go, Yeoul-ah?"
That shameless bastard asked as if nothing was wrong. I gritted my teeth at Mo Taehee's innocent question, who was responsible for more than half of my plan to run away in the middle of the night. My lips were so swollen that they were bursting, and I was wearing a hat and mask, covering my face as much as possible. The fingers that had slipped into the padding wriggled anxiously.
"A walk..."
"At this hour?"
"...Just... I couldn't sleep."
I felt my voice muffled by the mask, but I couldn't bring myself to take it off and mumbled.
"Take off your mask."
Nam Kangwoo said irritably, unable to watch any longer. At those words, my body jumped without noticing. I put my hand over my mask and shook my head.
"No," I said, not forgetting to answer in a trembling voice.
"Yeoul."
"Ha Yeoul."
"Hey."
I raised my head towards the ones sitting side by side calling my name. The tension that had been building up in my body gradually drained away. I leaned back deeply against the back of the sofa, which I had been holding upright, and pulled up my legs.
Yeah, rather now. Before dawn, in the early morning, when I'm even a little emotional, let's reveal that I'm not Ha Yeoul and get kicked out to Ha Yeoul's house. These guys are all rich, so Ha Yeoul must be rich too.
I opened my mouth to blurt out the thought I had impulsively decided on.
"I'm actually."
My mouth opened faster than I thought. It was the moment when I just had to reveal that I wasn't Ha Yeoul.
"I, I'm actually Ha Yeoul—"
And that golden moment was nicely blocked by the three of them talking.
"Well, it would be good to look into something that can be locked from inside the front door. A key or a lock or something."
"Yeah, Yeoul has been acting so strange lately that I'm worried."
"Isn't it like sleepwalking? It's dangerous to let him out."
What the hell are these crazy guys saying?
"What...? What are you saying?"
As I listened to the conversation in front of me, trying to prevent me from leaving this house, I unknowingly tore off my mask and hat.
"What... what are you talking about..."
"What? Hey, Ha Yeoul. What's wrong with your lips?"
"That's not the problem right now, you guys... what are you doing? Really... you're crazy... these crazy bastards..."
I held the mask and hat in both hands and trembled. I thought the crazy guys weren't normal, but to think that they were going to think I was... acting strange and try to lock me up. It was even scarier.
"No... I'm not really sleepwalking... it's not strange... I'm just..."
It wasn't those guys who were bursting with emotion this early in the morning, it was my tears. Damn it...
"Sniff... no, I... sob... sniff..."
I shed tears like chicken droppings and cried, unable to speak properly. I threw shame to the wind and mumbled words that even I couldn't understand.
For example, why did I come here, how nice would it have been if it were you, or you, or you, you crazy bastards, why don't you meet Park Min-ah? Why are you so obsessed with me? I said all the words that came to my mind randomly in slurred pronunciation.
The sight of me shaking and crying must have been pitiful, because the guys sitting side by side looked flustered. Nam Kangwoo was the first to come to his senses and pulled out a tissue from the center of the table and came towards me. He sat on the table and wiped away my constantly flowing tears. With a careful touch, as if touching glass beads.
They say that the more sad you are, the more you cry when someone comforts you. I couldn't control the emotions that had become even more sad than before, and I shed tears and snot. In the end, I begged, "Don't lock me up, I won't go out."
Nam Kangwoo accepted all of those cries and continued to wipe my face with his still soft hands.
"Stop crying, your eyes are as red as a rabbit's."
Saying it so kindly.
I still sobbed, unable to calm my emotions. Once the tears started, they didn't stop easily. As soon as Nam Kangwoo wiped my cheeks clean, I started shedding tears again as if nothing had happened.
"Okay. We're sorry. We said too much."
Nam Kangwoo put the tissue down on my reddened face and reached out to cover my cheeks. I felt a little calmer at the coolness felt on my flushed cheeks.
"Hey, Ha Yeoul. Why are you crying so much? Damn... you're crying so sadly."
I lowered my head, still sobbing. Seo Jaehoon stopped talking for a moment, then jumped up from his seat and walked towards the kitchen. I heard the sound of water dripping into a glass.
Seo Jaehoon, who quickly returned, checked my trembling hands, which were not calming down, and personally put the water cup to my mouth. I sweetly drank the lukewarm water that flowed into my parched mouth.
"Yeoul-ah, were you very surprised? We're sorry. We misspoke."
Even Mo Taehee, who came late, apologized, saying he was sorry. Surrounding the main seat on the sofa, the three of them comforted me for a long time until my sobs subsided.
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