I already knew that Lee Geumyeong showed hostility towards Han Jinheon. Even without specific information, it was obvious from her attitude when mentioning Han Jinheon and her reaction when facing him directly. Anyone with even a little perception would have noticed.
But now I learned that Han Jinheon also hates Lee Geumyeong. Although his attitude towards her was brusque, I was a bit confused whether he actually hated her or if it was just his usual demeanor and image. But now I know for certain.
Unable to retort, I remained silent. Han Jinheon set his book aside and continued speaking. Though his nonchalant tone made it sound like nothing important, it was far from that.
"As you know, because of your mother, my parents divorced, and after their imprint was broken, my mother fell ill and passed away. Well, her pre-existing illness was also a factor."
"..."
"It would be unfair to only blame your mother. It takes two to tango, so father also abandoned my mother. I hated both father and your mother, but I split that one hatred in half and kept an appropriate amount for each."
"..."
"If you want to hate, you can hate, but don't do anything you'll regret. As someone who only realized regret after losing, I'm sincerely advising you this."
Han Jinheon is an adult. Not just because he's thirty-five, but because he embraces even those who have hurt him. He doesn't try to persuade me to hate along with him, nor does he take the opportunity to badmouth Lee Geumyeong. He simply expresses genuine concern about a situation I might regret later.
To me, he was an adult. Someone I wanted to emulate and love.
"Han Sol."
I'm not sure how to respond to this new information. As I remain silent, Han Jinheon calls my name. I understand. He must be wondering why I always clam up whenever the topic of my mother comes up. I lift my head and meet his eyes.
"I'm saying this out of concern, even though I brought it up."
"...Yeah?"
"About imprinting. As I said before, if you don't want to imprint, you don't have to. Not everyone imprints. But what I want to say is that breaking an imprint doesn't always lead to the same outcome as my mother. Don't be afraid of imprinting."
I had previously expressed fear to Han Jinheon that imprinting didn't seem right. Back then, he had dismissed me as being frivolous, which hurt my feelings. But now, how should I put it? Rather than feeling reassured, I felt disappointed in a different way.
The alpha I would imprint with is not Han Jinheon. It cannot be Han Jinheon. Moreover, he's not even considering it, so I can't blame him for that. This is entirely appropriate. I'm the only one being strange, and my feelings for him are wrong.
"If you've imprinted, and you don't want to break it but your partner does, you can always tell me. I said I'd take responsibility."
"You'll step in to prevent them from breaking the imprint with me?"
"If that's what you want. If you meet someone decent, I won't need to intervene."
With those words and a wish for me to successfully manifest and meet a worthy alpha, Han Jinheon stood up and lightly tapped the top of my head with his book.
It was a strange sensation. The book pressed against my head, but the impression remained on my heart. My heart, compressed and misshapen, kept throbbing as if trying to regain its form. Without realizing it, I tightly gripped the hem of my clothes.
"My goal is simple. To keep you in my care until I can entrust you to an alpha I can trust."
"What do you mean 'entrust'? I'm not an object..."
Though I tried to grumble nonchalantly, my voice trailed off. It was my will that had suffered a harmless wound. I didn't want him to notice my choked-up voice from the surge of emotions.
I'm a person, how can you talk about 'entrusting' me? How can you do that? If you're going to keep me in your care, keep me always.
"When I achieve that goal... will you feel relieved? I don't like it. I hope no such alpha ever appears."
I pouted my lips visibly, pretending to complain while revealing my true feelings.
At this moment, I find myself desperately wishing. Wishing that the alpha Han Jinheon could trust and entrust me to would never appear. That he would never hand me over to anyone else. But every time I realize there's no reason for that, I end up feeling miserable.
I know this is doomed to despair since I'm falling for someone I shouldn't. My feelings had a predetermined end. If I become an omega, it would be the end of these fleeting emotions, and for my own sake, that's how it should be.
Of all people, why did I have to fall for Han Jinheon? Why did I have to fall for someone who's family, who's my brother?
How should I sort out these feelings? If I distance myself from Han Jinheon, could I resolve them? Then, is meeting another alpha he could entrust me to the only solution?
Conversely, this time with Han Jinheon, this "for now," was the only opportunity granted to me.
If these feelings must end anyway, I want to cherish them while I can. Even if the end brings great regret and deep wounds, I don't care. I want to love him with all my heart. I want to boldly embrace these feelings I've harbored for the first time.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
"Just... because I like you, hyung..."
Han Jinheon furrowed his brows. His reaction was a mix of slight aversion and embarrassment, as if wondering why I would say such a thing, but I won't back down. Seeing this alpha's reaction only strengthened my resolve.
"I'm looking at you because I like that you worry about me one way or another, so what!"
So, you know what? Your hand is bothering me. Stay still, I'm going to reapply the ointment!
***
Looking up at the gray sky, feeling the biting wind on my face, I thought about how it was mild autumn when I first came to this house, but now winter had arrived. It was already the last month of the year.
Today, with the cold in full force, was the day to go to the hospital.
I greeted Jeong Sungwoo, bundled up in a long padded coat, mask, and muffler. Secretary Jeong opened the back door, greeting me as it had been a while, and I thanked him as I got in.
The car started only after Secretary Jeong got into the driver's seat. I took off my mask and asked.
"Hyung is coming to the hospital separately, right?"
He said he would this morning, but I wanted to confirm since there was no reply to my message. I wanted to know if he would arrive on time or later than me.
"Yes. About an hour ago, I heard from Secretary Song that he got on the Gyeongbu Expressway."
"Ah... Is hyung coming back from somewhere in the provinces?"
"No. There's a site being developed as a new city in Gyeonggi area, and our construction company is involved, so he often goes to inspect the site."
"That... Could it be the project that was ruined because of me...?"
I remembered there was a new city development project among the businesses that had to be withdrawn when Han Sol's misdeeds were exposed. If it was that project, maybe I could ease some of my guilt.
Secretary Jeong, hesitating before answering, nodded. I almost misunderstood and felt disheartened. I thought it wasn't the case since he seemed to have difficulty answering.
Anyway, they managed to win back that development project.
"That's really fortunate."
Actually, I shouldn't feel uncomfortable, but if they've reclaimed the project lost due to Han Sol, maybe I can feel a little less guilty.
"As a new employee, I don't know the details, but I know the Executive Director worked hard for it. He's amazing. He's the most outstanding alpha I know."
"Someone might mistake him for a great historical figure if they heard you."
I giggled at Secretary Jeong's excessive praise, but I agreed.
"But I think the same as Secretary Jeong. He's an extraordinary person, even though he's my brother..."
And that's why he stole my heart too. I swallowed those words and looked out the window.
If I know anything from reading the novel, it's that although Han Jinheon is currently an executive director at HANQ Construction, his ultimate destination is HANQ Electronics.
He originally ran a film company following his mother's love for movies, but three years ago, he became the executive director of HANQ Construction, one of HANQ Group's subsidiaries. It seems he chose HANQ Construction because he was confident in that field, but having read the novel, I initially wondered if it was related to organized crime when I first heard the term "construction business."
However, HANQ is a solid business that has steadily grown since the liberation, and was now expanding into the construction industry.
I became slightly curious.
If Han Sol hadn't caused trouble and lived diligently, or if he had become an omega, would he have been in charge of one of HANQ's subsidiaries? Would he have had a title like Han Jinheon? It would have been quite thrilling to work with a title in the upper echelons of a large corporation. Director Han Sol, Senior Managing Director Han Sol, Executive Director Han Sol... Just imagining it makes me grin.
I composed my expression before Secretary Jeong could notice. As we arrived at the intersection where the hospital was located, I sent a message to Han Jinheon.
[I'm about to arrive at the hospital~]
[I'll be getting examined, so come slowly~]
[Okayy 🐶] 2:01 PM
Is this too much? Oh well, it's cute and nice.
As I was scrolling through the messages, I gently scratched the side of my nose and lowered my phone. Then I took in the sight of the large hospital visible through the car window. It's quite big. It's my first time visiting such a large hospital.
While I was absently marveling, a message notification rang. There was no need to check my phone; Han Sol had been cut off from everyone, so the only person I was in contact with was Han Jinheon.
Jinheon hyung
[Okay]
[Come over on your own after the examination] 2:05 PM
Huh? Come over on my own? Where to?
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