The moment I arrived back at the mansion, a call came from Lee Geumyoung. When I answered, a slightly excited voice pierced my ear. It seemed she was expecting my date to be going splendidly. How was I to break the news?
— How is it? Is the atmosphere good? It’s dinner time, you should be going to eat.
“No. It wrapped up early, so I’m home. I was planning to eat here.”
— What? What did you say? Why did it wrap up early? Don’t tell me you said you didn’t like him?!
I pulled the phone away from my ear. My ear ached even though she wasn’t with me. I imagined her glaring with those wide eyes, and a shiver ran through my body. When I thought about it, she felt more frightening because she was more of a stranger than a mother.
Lee Geumyoung said she thought we would have gone on to eat dinner and then ‘do the great deed.’ I grimaced at her words. Was the relationship between her and Han Sol that open? It was one thing for Han Sol to have played around promiscuously, but for his own mother to think of him that way was troubling.
Well, I supposed I had to tell her the truth.
“He threw water on me as soon as we said hello. I think he came with the intention of rejecting me because it was me.”
— He threw water on you? Water…? That son of a bitch!
Startled by the unexpectedly vulgar curse, I once again pulled the phone from my ear. She, whom I thought was cursing me, was now savagely cursing my blind date partner, and there was no end to it.
It wasn’t long before she stopped her enraged shouting—her cries of “how dare he throw water on you” and “this is an insult to HANQ.”
Unable to quell her anger, she let out a long, hot, heavy breath.
Hooo—
— Hankyo Daily. I won’t let them get away with this.
“I’d rather you just let it be… It seems I did something wrong to him in the past…”
— That doesn’t matter. To throw water, knowing who you are…! Forget it! We’ll just have you meet another one.
"What? Another one?”
Even if I did, the result would be the same. Now I saw that Han Jinheon was right. They weren't the type to accept me as a date, and even if they did, it was clear they would only show up to humiliate me, just like today. Knowing that, was I supposed to go again?
– This time, mom will choose. There’s a decent guy in the profiles mom gave you. Park Wonyoung, I think.
“It doesn’t matter who it is. Can’t we do this after the world has forgotten about me for a bit? If I do it now, I’ll just get more water… There’s no reason to rush, either.”
— Why is there no reason to rush? What will you do if your father, not the world, forgets you?
If he had been brilliant or had a strong business acumen, Han Sol would have secured a position in the company, but he had no talent in that area. He also lacked other artistic talents or sensibilities. He was a person who was outstandingly gifted in his face alone.
Typically, children from chaebol families who lacked ability, like Han Sol, relied on marriage. If he had been an Omega, he could have dominated the matchmaking market, but he wasn’t even that, forced to rely solely on the HANQ name. Lee Geumyoung’s words implied exactly this point.
If he didn’t even have the HANQ name, who would take him?
— Just because you’re going on dates doesn’t mean you have to get married right away. Just snag a decent-enough guy and show everyone that you’ve stabilized. It would be even better if it results in some future profit in the Chairman’s calculations.
“But I’m telling you, those decent-enough guys might be grinding their teeth at me.”
Besides, I’m already stable. I’m living comfortably by Han Jinheon’s side.
— Oh, right. About the money.
My heart had been heavy anyway. The date had been a bust before it even started, and I felt too guilty to accept the ten million won, wondering if I should return it. Having already lost a huge sum once, returning it didn’t even feel like a great loss.
Besides, I was uncomfortable that Han Jinheon already knew about it. Was he monitoring my bank account?
— When the appointment is set, I’ll send you more when I call.
“More… You’re going to give me more?!”
— Isn’t that what you wanted? If it’s not enough, tell me. I’ll send you whatever you need.
Lee Geumyoung ended the call with a final remark that she approved of me being crazy for money instead of men.
Not only was she not taking the money back, but she was going to give me more. I was dumbfounded. If the next date ended like this one, I would have twenty million won just for getting water thrown on me twice.
No matter how much I hated working, no matter how much I wished for unearned income, was it really okay to make money like this?
This isn’t from the Chairman, so it should be okay to take it. Twice should be fine… Amid my concerns, my true nature, steeped in hypocrisy, surged forth. The corners of my mouth shot up to my cheekbones.
***
Han Jinheon came back earlier than I expected. Since he was off to have a “quality time,” I thought he would be incredibly late, but he came in before six o’clock, carrying what looked like high-end takeout.
It turned out to be my dinner. I was feeling down and hadn't planned on eating, but since he’d gone to the trouble of bringing it for me, I figured I should eat.
“Looks like you wanted to take care of me even while you were having your quality time.”
“Having a quality time doesn’t mean my sense of compassion disappears.”
Right. That’s true, but can’t you say it more prettily? Something like, ‘the heart that thinks of his little brother.’
Grumbling internally, I unwrapped the food. It looked delicious even at a glance, and my mouth started to water. Before picking up my utensils, I glanced at him, a look that meant, 'Is it really okay for me to eat this?' Our eyes met, and he gave a cool nod.
"Just seeing today, you should know. Going on blind dates is useless.”
“…”
“If you want to achieve your goal through blind dates, the profiles your mother gives you won’t work. Perhaps if it were the profiles your father gave you.”
“…”
“Those candidates wouldn’t care what you did, or if you’re a Beta. They’re not interested in you, but in getting closer to HanQ through you.”
I had already figured that much out, so I ate in silence. But before long, I glanced at Han Jinheon and slowly put down my chopsticks. I had meant to tell him as soon as he came in, but I’d gotten distracted by his early return and forgotten. It was a bit awkward to bring it up after what he’d just said.
“Hyung, I think I have to go out again next Wednesday…”
“Not surprising. You’re going to waste your time again.”
"W-What do you mean….”
“Let me ask. Who is it this time?”
As expected, he was quick-witted and had a sharp nose for things. Even though I had deliberately omitted the word ‘date,’ this man had immediately grasped the context and asked with a weary face.
I would probably have the same reaction. Here was a guy whose date had been a disaster, and not even a day later, he was talking about another one.
I was embarrassed too. I hadn't known Lee Geumyoung would schedule another one as soon as she hung up the phone.
“Park Wonyoung, I think. I’ll have to look at the profile again properly… but I think the name is right.”
“Be honest with me. Why are you going on these dates?”
“Huh? Why am I going…?”
“You hated it when Father gave you the profiles. You had no intention of going.”
“The candidates back then were just too much. A father with kids, another with four mistresses… The profiles Mom gave me, as you saw yourself, aren't the candidates better than the ones Dad gave?”
“That’s why I told you. Because they’re decent, because, to put it bluntly, they don’t have flaws, they won’t sincerely accept the current you.”
Today’s date had proven Han Jinheon’s words right, so I had nothing to say. But if I had to nitpick, Han Jinheon had said half the candidates would be like that. The other half might not be. They might see me in a positive light and accept me sincerely. As long as they didn’t throw water on me right from the start.
Han Jinheon found this optimistic thinking frustrating. He lifted one of his arms from the table, ran a hand roughly over his face, and sighed.
Not wanting to provoke him further when he seemed so annoyed, I focused on my food. I had told him what I needed to, so that should be enough. I chewed quietly, trying to erase my presence as much as possible. I wanted to leave, but I was afraid that would just irritate him more.
“Han Sol.”
Han Jinheon, who had been silent for a while with his forehead in his hand, called my name. I nearly choked in surprise. I thumped my chest with a fist and managed to answer. “Huh?”
“Is it because of Kim Gyuyoung?”
“……”
“You’re not the type to meekly obey your mother because of money.”
Cough—. Stricken with guilt, I choked again.
Han Jinheon was wrong. There were two reasons I was going on these dates, and one of them was money. The Han Sol he knew had plenty of money, so he had no reason to listen to his mother.
But unfortunately, I was a puppet who moved for money. I was also a coward, so since I had received something, I had to do something in return.
And the other reason. The remaining one wasn’t Kim Gyuyoung, but Han Jinheon. Because he made my heart flutter so helplessly.
“Are you upset because Kim Gyuyoung is getting married? So you think, ‘I should get married too,’ is that it?”
"No! I don’t know why you think that, Hyung, but let me be clear. It’s absolutely not because of Kim Gyuyoung.”
“Then why the sudden interest in blind dates?”
“A person’s heart can be like that. I just…! Suddenly felt like I wanted to, that’s all!”
“You said you would reflect. Is this what you call reflection, going on blind dates?”
“I’ve been behaving myself for a month, that should be enough. And what do blind dates have to do with reflecting?”
“Why wouldn’t it matter when you’re running around outside so recklessly?”
"What’s so reckless about it… Isn’t this a good thing for you? You said it yourself before. That I should meet someone who recognizes my true worth. That I should live a life filled with love!”
“I did, but the condition for my words was when you become an Omega.”
“I can better discern someone who recognizes my true worth when I’m a Beta. And who knows? I might use these dates as an opportunity to settle down with someone who sees my true value…”
“Look at the state of you now. Who would gladly accept a Beta who can’t even bear children?”
A dagger stabbed into my heart, and the thread of my reason snapped. That last remark was a huge wound. Even his stoic face, unaware that he had misspoken.
Is this how Alphas in this world think? Is your way of thinking the norm, Hyung? Or am I the strange one?
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